Bakit lagi mo na lang ginugulo ang isip ko? Alam mo ba na okey na sana ako? Sabi ko sa last post ko, tapos na eh, gets ko na na wala lang naman talaga. Pero bakit ba nagpakita, nagpaalam at yumakap ka pa? Awkward.
Sorry, awkward moment talaga yun kahapon. Hindi naman kasi ako sanay na ganun ka sa akin because you always keep your distance from me. For many times, inisip ko na mas mabuti nga yun ganun -- less attachment, less prone to intrigues because it seems like people are attaching meaning to our every move. Honestly, hindi ko gusto yun ganun. I just feel bad about it because I have been through similar situations before. Nakaka-inis lang yun bigyan ng malice ang lahat kahit simpleng gesture lang; pero mas nakaka-inis lang siguro dati kasi feeling naman yun guys. That's one reason why I told you last Wednesday na thankful ako sa iyo because you have been a real gentleman. And even though some people put a question mark on your being a man, para sa akin mas mas real man pa rin yun tulad mo -- or at least the way I see you and the way you act when we are in the same place. Awkward rin kasi I don't know how to react when you approached me sa classroom and hugged me -- nakaka conscious lang kasi may mga tao and baka ano na naman sabihin nila -- sana kasi niyakap mo na lang silang lahat eh! I wanted to hug you back to thank you, kaso nga awkward moment.
Last night's SMS exchanges was nice. I just like the way our minds and humor meet often times -- bihira lang kasi yun ganun, most guys either get pissed off with my semi-harsh blows or entirely shy away or feel insecure when I share my serious thoughts; others give off dry humor so turn off. So pwede na kitang idagdag sa listahan ng very few guys whom I really consider as friends, not just colleagues or acquaintances. Waking up with the sound of an SMS from you this morning is just kind of sweet.
Pero ganun na lang. There may be fleeting moments here and there pero ayaw ko na mag-assume. Masakit kasi yun sisihin ka ng guy for falling in love with him at sabihan ka na layuan siya pagkatapos ng ilang taon na he befriended you, make you feel like his princess; sorry, wala kang kinalaman dun pero I learned many lessons the hard way sa experience na yun. So I guess we will be friends; I hope so.
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