After forcefully keeping my fingers from stroking the keyboard, I can't help but blog today. There are a lot of things that happened the past days. I've been through a lot of confusions the past days, and I thank Angel and D for their advice and concern. I really don't know what to do, especially during those days when everything just seemed to be out of control, when I can't even think clearly of what to do, when a lot of worries occupied my mind. The days went on, just like any day with Nascent walking like a zombie. She's definitely out of her wits. Maybe some people just don't seem to understand her. To most of them Nascent is just another childish soul, some even sees her as a brat, but beneath that surface lies what no one can see, much more comprehend. Nascent is afraid of a lot of things, but she never quit on trying to overcome her weaknesses. It's quite hard to face challenges when you are forced to face it, when you have no choice but to do it. It's like a do or die situation. Maybe Nascent just opted to be like a child, willingly accepting what life has to offer. Always believing that there are still a lot of good things here on earth.



But some things just make Nascent sad, like silence. For silence is more deafening than noise. For silence must not be equated to peace. Peace is not silence. Nascent is sad over the lost of some people who have been dear to her. Perhaps that's how life goes. Sometimes Nascent just can't take it all. Through the years, Nascent learned how to say no, how to say nothing. Nascent has her own way of pretending to be insensitive, pretending to be happy, no, it's not really pretending, perhaps trying is a better tem. Perhaps it's better to remain silent for now, though her heart aches with just the thought of it. Sana nga lang, they can be with her these days, when Nascent just feel like crying, when she need their care. Pero siguro, kailangan lang niya matutong mapag-isa. Sabi nga, the greatest teacher is experience. Siguro I just have to walk through all these alone. I've lived most of my years alone naman eh, nakakalungkot pero what can I do? Minsan naitanong ko na rin sa sarili ko, am I the only one who's being childish? At times I think not. Again, I opt not to expound on the thought. Am still thankful that friends are still there to remind her of a rainbow after the rain, that every storm has its eye, where there is calmness.



And the wheel must turn, the cycle must go, and Nascent Charm just have to …



Sometimes it's hard to express what you truly want. Frustrating indeed.