Someone asked me: Ikaw, kaya mo bang tanggapin kung aminin ng guy sa iyo na bisexual siya? Okay lang ba sa iyo na maging kayo knowing na while at this point ikaw ang gusto niya pwedeng at another point lalaki naman? Gugustuhin mo bang maging husband siya, if ever? (Ako: Huh? Face palm, speechless) Kapag kaya mo na sagutin 'yan pag-usapan ulit natin ha!
My response if ever that person asks me again would be something that goes: This question actually reminds me of a guy back in college. He would often do things that make me feel kilig, calls me his princess and tell people, "wag nyo aawayin 'yan kundi ako makakalaban nyo!" even when I am just at hearing range. I used to think that he would be a great boyfriend once we graduated from college (haha..strict ang parents ko, bawal ang bf while still in school!). I mean he is smart, neat, tall quite good looking, nice and sweet to me. But that fantasy of mine only lasted for three semesters because come our 5th sem in college it turned out that he is...yep, you guessed it, a gay guy. So the kilig memories and the joys of being his princess turned into wondering if he was just applying to be my personal stylist or if he was just a kid who was unsure of his preference. My bad, I wasn't aware of those things yet at that time!
Now for my response, first let me point out that I value mutual love, respect, honesty and fidelity. That being the case, I would appreciate the guy's sincerity and courage in telling me that. I am pretty sure that many will be afraid of telling the truth for fear of being judged and rejected. I am not so oblivious of the realities about people's sexuality and sexual preferences -- I am aware of those things now. But it doesn't mean that it would be easy for me to jump into a relationship with a bisexual guy. Not that I am judging or outrightly rejecting the idea; I just have some set of parameters that I prefer to hold on to as part of my personal values. I am not imposing this unto other people, but if someone wants to be that part of my life, then we need to talk about it. Granted that we may have lived our lives the past years and have different world views, am still looking for commonalities. I am looking for common values, common traits, common interests or profession -- something upon which we can anchor our relationship. Now this drives me back to my first point -- I value mutual love, respect, honesty and fidelity -- core values that he must be willing to share with me if he wanted to pursue a romantic relationship. Simply put, I can accept the fact that there might have been "shes" and "hes" in his past but if he wants a future with me then there must only be "US."
No comments:
Post a Comment